i've realized this a long time ago but just recently thought more about it. whenever i get really angry or depressed i whisper to myself (more as a plea) that i want to go home, even if i am already at home. i think it's a way to try to get away from the feeling. like if i keep wishing i was home i won't have to deal with this. or maybe home is somewhere else completely; maybe i think of home as a place of peace and therefore wish for peace while in the midst of hard emotions. i don't know but i found it to be an interesting thing.
i read the other day how chocolate can make you happy because it stimulates endorphin production which can give you feelings of pleasure and that it can sometimes act like an anti-depressant because of the serotonin. i found this to be very entertaining because i have never felt pleasurable, happy, or not depressed after eating chocolate. i have always felt guilty, regretful and depressed afterwards. i'm not sure if this is just me, or do other people feel the same way? or maybe there's something's just wrong with me.