it seems to be that i'm starting to let go of my previous thoughts about food. life is short, so why not enjoy what you're eating and why not try new things and have fun with your food? it's completely ridiculous to think that controlling the food that goes into your mouth will somehow be helpful. i laugh at myself sometimes when i realize how silly that really is. i try to remind myself of this fact when ed is strong. i laugh at him and say fuck it and just go with what i need. sometimes this doesn't always work out i must say but hey i gotta start somewhere right?
i graduated today! it felt good but people kept asking me if i felt any different and i didn't. i saw my friend that i met while i was in klarman. she was also taking the online classes and graduated. i stuck with her most of the day which was nice and i was surprised with my myself that i was able to be open and free around her. it felt comforting. mom, dad, cam, alexa, mike, ben, nicole, pam, and i all went out to dinner at olive garden afterwards. i had looked online before hand at what i was going to get and how many calories it was so i wasn't too nervous. i got steak. but i also got a strawberry lemon aid just for fun. it was nice to just have fun and enjoy the moment and the company. good day i would say.